I hereby dedicate this monument to nothing,
and the nothing that happened here for thousands of years
before the construction of this great stone, upon which
the aforementioned monument is now being placed.
Furthermore, I would like to have recorded that I,
in the interests of nothing, am donating all
of my future time and resources to aid nothing,
so that if nothing is accomplished, it will be known.
Furtherfurthermore, today, August the 25th,
shall from henceforth be venerated in this place as
Nothing Day, and for generations to come will still
be celebrated for no particular reason.
Once forgotten, a committee will restore this stone,
adding carefully inscribed dedications to us.
The response to nothing has been overwhelming, though
no monument can bring back what has not been lost here.